Jim A-Ticket

While we're on the topic of gyms and the etiquette (lacking) in them, here are a few other things I don't appreciate. People who ...

- do sets to failure, and then drop them on the floor with a big crash
- make huge huffing and puffing and groaning sounds during their set
- think the gym is a meat market
- do a set (30 seconds) and then flex and admire themselves in the mirror (2m30s) and occupy that machine/bench for the whole time
- occupy a machine while they sit on it just to rest or SMS or chat on their phone
- stink, as in didn't-let-my-sweat-gym-clothes-dry-since-last-time stink
- put on tons of make-up just to look pretty while at the gym
- horde four different sets of dumbbells like they're collectibles
- waste your time by talking to you for great lengths
- think they're the sh!t just because they're buffed

I think that's about it for me. Now you go: name yours.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

How about muscleheads whose upper bodies are disproportionately large compared to their teeny tiny lower half (ie/ stick legs)? Actually, that just freaks me the hell out.
JON

head dump said...

I really don't care what other people are doing in the gym. The make up, the outfits, the poses, I dont' care. Just as long as they don't get in my way. But DO put on deodorant, I can't breath when you stink. Do wipe off your dripping sweat from the machine. AND AND!!! DON'T FART IN THE GYM! Just because we don't know where it came from doesn't mean it's okay!

Anonymous said...

I got you all beat -

I HATE IT WHEN men at the gym think that it's ok to leave ANONYMOUS notes on the windshield of your car that say - "I noticed you in the gym, I think you're a cutie."

I THINK YOU'RE A WEIRDO!!! Do they NOT realize that behavior like that scares the living CRAP out of females!!!

Stick to admiring YOURSELF at the gym - ASS!

Ben said...

Jon, hahahahaha, I know what you mean. In fact, I'm like that ... except without the large upperbody.

HD, oh man, you got some good ones there. I had one guy with such bad BO who walked by my general area and stank like last week's dinner left in the Taiwanese sun. My eyes watered, my throat cracked dry, and I could swear I saw nearby plants wilt -- I literally couldn't finish my tricep pulldown set. My workout partners laughed, the great support that they are.

And if you don't know who to blame, it does SO mean it's okay to fart! Ha.

Taj, sorry about that; I don't know what I was thinking. I was just overcome by your (virtual) sexiness, I guess.

I got one more: people who pass by or stand close to you while you're in the middle of a set. When you are that close, it bothers me because sometimes I have weights that I am at the limit of not being able to lift/pull; I don't need the added threat that your carelessness could bump the weight, make me lose concentration, and cause me to injure myself or someone else. Stay the fvck away; leave some safety margin, you dolt! (I've even had a trainer bump into my bench bar once -- luckily, I was doing a second warmup set.)

Anonymous said...

Hey Ben,
That reminds me of something I've always pondered - what is the ideal distance to wait next to/by/around a person to indicate that you are waiting for them to finish with a particular machine or weight? If you stand too close, you'll be considered rude because it'll seem like you are rushing that person. If you stand too far away, another gym-rat might budge into your 'queue' at the exact right moment (just as that person is finishing). Is simply putting your towel/sweatrag next to that person indication enough? Tell me, Ben!
JON

Ben said...

Jon, you make it sound like I'm the expert or something. I'm totally not; just opinionated on the subject matter.

I don't mind if someone is waiting for me some 5-10ft away. If he's standing there, believe me, I'll notice him (most of the time, if I'm not tuned out). But the thing is, he has to be standing there -- that is, doing a set of some other exercise to fill in the time doesn't signal to me that he wants my machine. Usually, there's somewhere nearby that is an obvious good place to stand and wait -- sometimes, it's sort of between two of the same machines (like two bench press benches), where you kind of make a triangle with them. Then you can kind of wait for both; hedge your bets on which one is slower.

But I never put my towel on another man's machine. (Jeez, that sounded a little nasty, didn't it.)

And anyway, with me, I don't really waste time on the machines, so I can't be rushed any faster than I'm already doing it, and he can have it when I'm damned well done with it.

Anonymous said...

Maybe because I'm a girl, I don't mind making it obvious that I'm waiting for the machine. Usually the guy'd get so nervous he would just pretend he's done. And usually if I stare hard enough, he'll put the weights back.

I ABSOLUTELY HATE IT when men leave the weights, esp. those 45 pounder. There is no way for a girl to take it off of the machine and move it to the appropriate rack, and repeate 3 times without being left with some permanent damage on the joints. Be courteous!