So I was chilling at home mid-day (because I can), and my mobile phone rings. Caller ID says the phone number calling is "1". Huh, that's interesting. Having piqued my curiosity, I answered. A very scripted voice on the other end sprung into life (in Chinese).
"Hello, we want to introduce you to [BlahBlah Inc., I can't remember the name]. [blah blah blah ... she read really fast, and I kind of tuned out at this point as I let her finish her two or three paragraphs.] We'd like to send you a brochure. What address shall I send it to?
I wanted to answer her, but first, I needed to get some answers of my own. I politely inquired,
"Hi, how did you get my number?"
I think she was taken aback by this question, but she had a (prepared) answer.
"Oh, we have our call list from Taiwan Mobile, so those are the numbers we call."
Very well, then. I didn't like the answer, but she wasn't the right person to unleash my anti-telemarketer fury upon anyhow. And anyway, she didn't give me much time to consider her response, because she jumped right back into her script ... and repeated pretty much verbatim one of her previously-read paragraphs. I cut her off, because she was talking too fast.
"Sorry, what did you say [BlahBlah Inc.] was?"
"It's a shopping mall, which is similar to Sogo and ShinKong Mitsukoshi. Where can we send you the brochure?"
I get a lot of junk mail already, and in the interest of not getting more -- as well as letting them save their brochures for people who might be more interested -- I gave her my response.
"Oh, that's okay. You don't need to send me one."
Well, that's neat. My reply probably wasn't on her list of possible answers, and she stammered,
"Um, what?"
"It's okay, please don't send me one."
I mean, I think I was being pretty nice about it. And you know, she probably never came across someone like me. Because ... she really wasn't equipped to handle it, which led to her final response.
"Er ... ahhhhh, 幹你娘 [you motherfvcker]!"
[hang up]
Maybe I should have just accepted the brochure.